A profound, brilliant, moving, amazing poem my son wrote last week:
Past Dawned Upon
Trekking onward,
Over hills,
Through valleys.
The sun sets,
The shadows creep,
Danger comes upon me.
***
I’ve been through here,
Once before.
Long ago.
Fear grips at me,
As I see a familiar face.
It laughs at me,
As I walk nervously.
***
I feel abandoned,
The lantern is out,
The darkness surrounds me.
I have to get out.
I can’t stay here.
They are coming again,
For revenge.
***
Can no one save me,
From this hole?
Am I doomed to repeat,
A past fate?
***
A single thread,
Is holding holding me together,
Should it snap,
What will become of me?
***
I moan within,
Nowhere to flee.
They’re everywhere,
Sucking away my sanity,
Sucking away my life.
***
Oh Light, where art Thou?!
Why have you left me?
***
This is the Trial of my Soul,
I want to reach out for help,
But I fear of dragging them down with me.
Must I fight this alone?
***
Where is myself?
I cannot afford to revert.
Anger grips at me,
Hatred,
Hopelessness,
Loneliness.
It has returned with vengeance.
***
Have I called this upon myself?
Am I a filthy man?
Surely this is not my final hour.
I shall not return to that cage…
***
Oh Light,
I cry to Thee,
And Thou hasn’t heard me!
Have I wronged Thee so?
Am I deserving of such demonic beatings?
***
I know that I am sinful,
The worst of all,
But do not abandon me!
Without You, I am nothing.
I will return to the dust.
***
I cry invisible tears,
I wear a mask.
People think I’ve got it together,
But the Temple is crumbling.
I can’t keep it up,
The beasts are forcing their way in.
Oh Light,
Where art Thou?!
***
I am failing,
I am scared,
Is it my fate to return,
To the old me?
Why have they returned to taunt me?
***
Shall I become an empty shell again?
Shall they steal my soul?
Gnaw upon it and feast?
Oh Light,
Hear my final desperate cry!
For I am at my human limit!
***
Do not let me fall back into the black sludge,
From a Past Once Dawned Upon!
Save me!
For within I weep.
If Thou shall not save me,
Who will?
~*~*~*~
Modest Musings 