In the Waiting Room

While looking through one of my old spiral notebooks this afternoon, I found this little stream-of-conscience piece I had written while waiting at the children’s hospital with my family for results on my youngest son, Christoper’s MRI results on the remnants of his brain tumor. I’d forgotten I’d written this!

Since it was just a spur-of-the-moment thing, I failed to write down the date that I created it. Considering this was a time when I was still married, I’m guessing this note was sometime between 2014 and 2020.

I found this very short message somehow touching and visceral, so I decided to share it here with you all, my friends from all over the world.

__________________

As I wait with my son and husband to be called back to one of the patient rooms, my body is a walking zombie with dopey (? can’t read) and sleeping waves rolling through me.

Christopher waits patiently to find out, as do his dad and I, what his MRI results are.

Yellows, oranges, and reds across from us with an astronaut posing with arms outstretched to take off any minute.

A blue sky with wispy clouds frame the silver suit flaming reds and blues.

Makeshift wings stand alert, unfolded and bold at his sides.

A blue screen sixty feet across sleeps, displaying no images. Is this a resting mini-theater scheduled for future shows?

Several images representing flying. Flying high, soaring, reaching, transcending illness, challenges, pain, and crossing over to healing an all-encompassing healing of soul and body.

Flying correlates with a sense of spiritual ascendency.

But truly, if I close my eyes, I could fall right to sleep.

This Valium affects me like never before, and not just takes off the anxious edge, but this time, it’s created a drowsiness where everything, including me, moves in slow motion, like those running on film that is slowed down, and the person’s arms and legs rotate like the gears of a clock running out of batteries.

Hopefully, soon, we shall be sitting in the patient room hearing something akin to no change or dissipated remnant. Only God knows.

____________________

In 2020, my son’s brain tumor disappeared. He’d had it since he was an infant (don’t know the exact point it appeared and grew in his head, but he was diagnosed with the brain tumor attached to his brain stem in 2003 when he was 13 months old). We were so surprised when the doctor said the tumor was gone, I remember. I nearly couldn’t speak. However, it was welcome news and joy grew inside me and life changed at that moment for Christopher and the whole family. Thank you, God!

How Do You Get the Words on Paper? Return to Writing

A couple of days ago, I was on the phone with a dear friend. She works in theater and has written her own plays in the past few years that she also directed that were performed at the local theater of which she was a member.

Unfortunately, some serious family health issues came about for her family a few years ago, and it’s been extremely stressful and emotionally draining for her and her family.

She’s not been able to continue the goals she had set for herself since then but is patiently waiting for a time where theater work and going back to school can re-enter her life.

I know how hard it is to go through and cope with a sick family member and the stress and strain it puts on both your mental and physical health.

My friend does need a healthy outlet that gives her a short window of time to herself. It’s important for her own health.

So she texted me yesterday using a voice message, that she’d attended a board meeting at the local theater she is now connected to (don’t know how long and when she started up with this particular one), and they were discussing upcoming events for the summer and short, one-act plays.

She’d actually brought this up to me a few days ago, and I will maybe do another blog post on my own plays, but this post is about picking up writing after serious life events takes up all your free time and energy.

She’d told me in our last conversation that she’d lost her creativity and didn’t know how to regenerate it. She asked me how I do so in my writing.

I told her I hadn’t written from the time I married in 1997 until 2014. A very long hiatus because of family life and health issues of my youngest son replacing any creative writing ideas and even thoughts.

But my writing returned when it was the right time for me in my life. God’s time. And it brought me through a lot of emotional hardships. I began to rediscover who I truly was, found catharsis and healing through these years, and continue to find content and healing in my writing.

My advice to her, using my own method, was to jot down notes of what she was wanting to write about. The characters, plot, and have a beginning and end in mind so that you are more likely to be able to finish your play or story.

Yes, I’ve struggled through the ideas of characters, scenes, etc. for upcoming chapters in a current work-in-progress, as well as on potential stories that swirled in my mind for a couple days that I hadn’t yet written any notes for. And even when I know what I want to say and how the scene will play out, there are times I can’t get anything down on the Word document or paper.

The answer to this is to just start typing whatever comes out in creating your scene and chapter. Eventually, about halfway down the first page, you become engrossed in your characters and what they’re doing in the scene, and you are able to complete at least that scene or even a full chapter.

This has worked for me every single time I’ve done it.

My friend had told me she hasn’t even been able to write down simple little poems she usually can do quite easily.

I told her to think of her writing as an escape from her stressful current reality to a realm where she can immerse herself for a time to find solace, creativity, and contentment for that short period. It will help her feel a sense of joy and a quiet moment to herself.

She’ll be creating as she’s wanted to do, and at the same time, experience relief from stress, which will help her overall health.

I’m sure I’ve written a few blogs already on the difficulties of getting back into writing after short or long dry periods, but I felt compelled to write this today after having the talk with my dear friend.

If you are having troubles writing caused by whatever events or obstacles in your life, remember that you can find a window to that creative side of you.

Try reading material you’ve already written to prime the pump in getting ideas to flow inside your mind and heart that will translate to writing on your computer or paper.

These strategies of mine always work for me. I hope it does for you too.

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Comfort in the Midst of Chaos

 

With all the destruction, illness, division, catastrophes, brokenness, heartache, and despair around the globe, sometimes we need to find the good, the beautiful, the peaceful in our lives.

Family & Friends lift up, support, and encourage us to continue being us.  

group of people sunset

Hobbies (perhaps even our jobs) give us joy and satisfaction.

knitting artistic painting cooking pic gardening hobby

Nature replenishes our spirits and calms our stresses.

RMNP 2 June 2017

Pets are a constant comfort whether we’re ill or healthy.

Wallpaper Of Cute Cats And Dogs Cat And Dog Wallpapers - Wallpaper Cave

God’s mercy and love warm us from within, giving us hope and peace.

God's love and for his glory

We’re alive, breathing, thinking, feeling, loving, and experiencing life.  

happy woman in sunset

 

Whenever you feel like you’ve been swept up in the world’s whirlwind of insanity and chaos, remember the good and beautiful. ❤

 

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